Remember a while ago I had a job interview and they thought I was great and asked when I could start? Well, two weeks ago I started my new job. I’m back there again today. I have a sinking feeling thinking about it. As soon as I’d left the job interview a couple of months ago I started sinking. And then stalling the starting date. And hoping it would just go away.
In between I was chasing up leads to outdoor work, to bush regenish type stuff. I got very close to one position but after four weeks of emails and calls and pestering them, it didn’t happen. So I resigned myself to the fact I would have to start the massage job.
My income has shot right up. People are liking my massage. Clients are rebooking with me. And hello? The income! It looks like I’m earning enough to stop all financial assistance from Centrelink.
And that is my first aim; to be off welfare and supporting myself. It’s great that I have been able to get some financial support on my slow weeks but most of the time I don’t get much and am in the highest job seeking bracket and it takes up HUGE amounts of time and doesn’t really help me find work. I do what is required and am grateful…
So, when I think of the money and that I’ll have much more control of my time and commitments, I feel positive. I’m better able to repay loans from family, more able to move out with my boyfriend… and I don’t have to be in these jobs forever…
Perhaps I’m being a responsible adult.
Perhaps I’m tired of giving.
Perhaps this is my final flourish of massage.
Perhaps my sunkenness is confirmation that I’m ready to change careers.
Perhaps I’ll just get ready for work and allow my story to unfold as the days, weeks and months go by.